Tuesday, June 23, 2015

Trudging Through Quicksand

I am happy to say that I am home from the hospital and officially two thirds of the way done with my chemo treatments! Thank you, Lord!

I was more patient while I was in the hospital this time. Although the process was no faster, I knew what to expect, so I think I dealt with it better. It also helped that my wonderful daughter stayed with me every night. She was the best at keeping me upbeat and supplied with whatever I needed, mostly just her delightful company!

Sadly, Eric didn’t have a very celebrated Father’s Day. At least when I was in the hospital for Mother’s Day, my family brought me gifts and balloons. With me in the hospital for Father’s Day, he got nothing! :-( He definitely gets a do-over someday. :-)

Now that I’m home, I feel exhausted, mentally dull, and like I’m trudging through quicksand. My mind and muscles don’t want to even work. I’m praying this will pass quickly, as we have much to do in the next month!

As some of you have read or heard, we are moving to Atlanta. Over the last couple of weeks, we did a bit of house-hunting, and we have a contract on a house there and are supposed to close on July 24th. In the meantime, we’re trying to get the kids’ school records transferred and get them signed up for the classes they need, which we’re finding to be challenging for Savannah as some of her classes are full. We’re also trying to get our current house ready to go on the market, having defective hardwoods replaced, and getting movers scheduled around my chemo treatments. It turns out that trudging through quicksand is not helpful with any of that.

Eric is working non-stop on everything that needs to get done, while I mostly sit and move in slow-motion. Of course, he doesn’t mind a bit. He reminds me that my job is to rest and get well. He is amazing! I truly have never seen a more hard-working, dedicated man, who loves his family more than Eric or who is a more diligent worker or boss at his job. He doesn’t complain or stop to have pity-parties. He just keeps a good attitude and keeps moving and doing what needs to be done. I cannot tell you how grateful and undeserving I feel of his love and devotion. (Just read 1 Timothy 3:1-7 and Titus 1:6-9 for a full picture.)

Okay, I realize that might have been awkward, but I just had to get that out! He is AMAZING! All right, I’m done . . . for now.

I wish I had something creative and deep to end with, but I mostly just feel like we are in the middle of a whirlwind right now, and my hands are tied. I’m watching things get done around me, but I’m just spectating. It’s not a good feeling, but I know God is doing something even in the whirlwind. He doesn’t waste these moments of feeling helpless and tossed about. He still wants us to trust in Him, that He is in control, even when we don’t know what He’s doing. He will bring about good things in His time and for His purposes. 

Until then, I’ll be trudging my way through the quicksand and watching the whirlwind go by, if you need me.

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